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Dear Diary 1.26.2017

So no writing on my site in two months!  What is the world coming to?  Actually I’ve been busy as all hell trying to get this, that and the other thing done.  I’ve been writing up a storm trying to finish The Tumble and coordinating with my girl The Illustrator, Phoenix Chan to get The Slipper 2 Coloring Book underway.  She’s working on part 2, perfecting the sketches.  I’m praying that once we debut and put it on the market, we get a good response.  Who knows?  I keep daydreaming that Barnes and Nobles will call me up and say hey, we wants what you gots!  Whatever!  LOL  It’s an exciting and nerve-wracking time.


Oddly enough my tiger be trying to get back into my good graces, in order for that to happen I would have to fall from grace and I ain’t tryin’ to do that for a myriad of reasons.  I’m at peace.  I’ve finally got my shit together, my priorities are all different; wedding, writing, home, sailor, family, friends – I’m keepin’ it simple and I’m diggin’ it.  Nothing to worry about, nothing to fear, nothing to stress.  Do I miss some of the excitement that came with the bullshit?  Honestly yes, sometimes I do.  But that chic who could handle the excitement – that bitch is gone.  I don’t know where she went and quite frankly I wouldn’t mind callin’ her ass back for a minute because that bitch had energy, that bitch was in shape and lovin’ the process of getting into shape.  Meanwhile this bitch’s process of getting in shape is sporadic at best!  My energy seems to only come through on a Saturday morning, while I’m making breakfast in my nightgown (which resembles my mama’s ensembles more and more – bitch ain’t tryin’ to look hot, bitch is tryin’ her utmost to be comfortable) – and dancing to some reggae while waiting for the toaster to pop out my bagel!

Anyhoo so why now at work everybody thinks I’m Google?  I mean I know I’m the office manager, executive admin. assistant and IT personnel but now it seems that everyone has really gotten into the habit of just asking me the most random shit ever.  The other day one of the fellas asked me how can he forward his iPhone number to another number.  I’m like say what now?

So of course even though I don’t know how to do that, I start researching on the net (the internet for those who don’t know I rename and shorten, sometimes lengthen depending on which way the wind blows) every name on the planet.  So I find the instructions, test em’ out on my personal phone and then email it to the bloke along with the instructions on how to stop the forward.  Now this fool must have passed by my desk four additional times and doesn’t say one word to me.  Not One.  Not Uno.  Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.  Ze-RO!  You know inside I was snakin’ my neck around like Oh No He Didn’t!  A few minutes later I see dude walk up in the kitchen, so I stalk and corner him inside and am like “did you get my email?”  Please tell me oh LionO of the Thunderfreakin’ Cats that this motherfreaker didn’t give me the blankest stare in the universe – like I just spoke to him in Chinese or something!

So I proceeded to say (in exaggerated, exasperated tones)  “the email I sent you with the instructions on how to forward your iPhone number, which you asked me about earlier bruh?”

So then he lurched forward like my Uncle Gophie clapped him on the back (wha happenin dare man) and said “Oh yes.  Yes I did get it, thank you.  Instead of saying you’re welcome I just smiled and did the perfunctory sharp nod thang like I was in the military.

Really?  All of this to avoid saying thank you?  Well dis mudda-rass don’t know me.  I will chase your ass like you were holding Chips Ahoy cookies for me thank you, shoooooooooooooooot!

On other fronts, had a great visit with mom and pop!  Trying to get stuff done for this wedding.

Thus far, we’ve got the hall and the temple booked, the flower guy and the photographer/videographer booked.  Dev’s got all three of her Indian outfits, we’re about to do a trial makeup thing on Saturday and get the invitations worded and sent to the printer for approval.  So I think we’re doing good.  After the invitations are done I’m going to solidify things with Wahid at Mingles and see about the bridal shower.  Tackling one thing at a time so God willing it all goes smoothly.

On the new new front – which only means I’ve newly discovered something – chances are it’s been around forever – i’m just slow on the uptake.  In any case Trevor Noah – I discovered him some months back and really liked how he presents topics, his take on them and the way he articulates and debates.  In short, he’s not just a pretty face but a wealth of information and intelligence.  I’ve got to do a little expose on him, give you a little background but I am going to post his Youtube interview with Charlamagne and you can get into it if you’re interested.  I highly recommend it.

Thank God it’s Friday.

Toodles poodles.